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How To Connect In Ten Seconds Or Less

When doing serving projects of any sort there is a moment of contact that either makes or breaks all the effort you have been working toward. It is that point at which you or someone on your team actually gets to explain what you are doing to the person you are serving. Most of the time this point of contact will come in the form of a conversation though sometimes it will happen as people read a connect card.

People really only give you a single moment to connect. Our fast paced culture has conditioned each of us to offer one another about a split second (make that ten seconds) of patience before the curtain comes down and we decide the person in question is an airhead that has nothing to say to us and therefore we will move on to the next roving message that drifts haphazardly in our direction.

Thus we need to pay attention to the way we come across. It isn’t all that difficult to come across in clever but sincere way.  If we are generally prepared with what we will say and how we will come across we will connect intelligently each time we have an opportunity to connect. Consider the following:

When you connect with others, be ready with what you are going to say.

It is necessary to say something memorable. Consider the following or example:

“This is to show you God’s love in a practical way…”

This is apparently memorable – I say this because people have come back to tell me they recall these words years after they heard them. For starters, in saying these few simple words you convey that you are doing this in the name of God. You establish that you are not merely a nice person who is out on a nice day. In saying that phrase you open the door for more God connected conversing in a natural and friendly manner. By the words “Practical way” you are clarifying that you are one who believes that doing these things is part of your action toward the community. In connecting in this way you are opening the door for more conversation – you can talk if they are curious about what kinds of people would do such things, or they can in turn find their way into the mix if they are interested in joining us in serving.  Don't forget--kindness is contagious.

Make sure you say something you find memorable as well. That is, make it something you say over and over again. If you have to make it up more than once you are saying something that is too complex. Put something together that is clear enough that you can remember to say it over and over again. There is nothing wrong with using a line as your defining explanation for what you do. You can use the lines of others, my lines, but if you find you can coin something that fits you better go with that. Just make sure it fits the bill of what we are focusing in on here today.  

It is necessary to say something clear about your identity. What you say needs to be self-defining so your hearers will grasp what you are all about. They need to catch in a few words what you are all about. For that to happen you need to choose strong, communicative words that will carry your concept forward.

Be enthusiastic, but not over the top. Remember, you have just ten seconds to connect with this person. You have just a moment to make a strong impression. You are going to have to pour your heart into it if you hope to make an impression that will be remembered for the better when the dust settles.

Finally, remember a few key thoughts that will keep you successful in this:

DON’T ask them for a “moment of their time.” That is a mistake. Just offer them your opportunity. They will give you their attention as you show them something worthwhile.

DO just start to explain what it is that you are about. Do it with passion. Passion begets respect always.

DON’T explain anything you aren’t already absolutely sold on. If there are questions in your heart about the reliability of the service, the concept, the group you are representing.

DO get those questions fully resolved before you spend any more time trying to get people to sign up. Ask all the questions you need to get into in order to become a raving fan of the concept. You are the representative of this concept to the public. You need to do whatever is required in order to have a clear heart and mind regarding this concept and the group you are working with. You will not be of much help to the cause until you are able to be fully committed to the cause.

DON’T continue to explain things if you for whatever reason don’t feel up to the task. If you aren’t feeling all that up at the moment, don’t waste the time of the one you are connecting with. You will simply undermine the success of your product if you waste this opportunity by talking when you are less then enthusiastic. You are wise to not continue to explain things therefore if you don’t feel well, if you are tired, etc.

Steve and his wife, Janie, are veteran church planters.  they are also amazing coaches.  If you would like to connect with personal training from the father of Servant Evangelism, be sure to visit SERVE COACH today!  Steve’s first book, Conspiracy of Kindness (Vine Books, 1993), has gained attention across a broad base of church leaders as an effective and creative approach to sharing the love of Christ. 101 Ways to Reach Your Community is a “cookbook” of projects and practical guide to getting started with Servant Evangelism.