Issue #32
Bluto's Campus Outreach Hints
Ask Dr. Savant
Outward Focused Living
Alert! This is Important! Don't Forget to Read It!
Field Notes
|
|
More question and comments about this article? Send a comment to the Editor and let us know! We may print it in the next issue in "The Mail Room" section.
| Technical Unkindness | |
| |
|
If I speak with human eloquence and angelic ecstasy but don't love, I'm nothing but the creaking of a rusty gate. If I speak God's Word with power, revealing all his mysteries and making everything plain as day, and if I have faith that says to a mountain, "Jump," and it jumps, but I don't love, I'm nothing. . . If we are going to strive to live a life that is truly focused outward, that means we need to be aware of others at ALL TIMES!  Let's face it. Life comes with far more bells and whistles than it did even just a decade ago. It seems as though the old SNL commercial was prophetic: "New Shimmer is a floor wax AND a dessert topping!" Not too long ago, wireless communication on the go was something that you only saw Captain Kirk do on television, but with today’s technology we are all able to stay in touch just about anywhere. With the smart phone, you are not just limited to phone conversations, you can multitask any number of applications. That does not mean you need to do it all the time! Being busy does not always mean you are being productive. Yet when I surveyed all that my hands had done Next time you are in a restaurant look around at the other tables and observe the interactions. Watch the nonverbal cues of the people sitting with a smart phone addict at their table. Do they look happy? As amazing as the smart phone might be, repeat after me: THERE IS NO APP’ FOR FRIENDSHIP OR INTIMACY! Whatever you do, do not strive to be efficient with conversations with friends—it never works out well. and what I had toiled to achieve, everything was meaningless, a chasing after the wind; nothing was gained under the sun. See, it is the portability of these devices that fools us into thinking we are not being rude. Let me exaggerate the point. How would you feel if you were out for a meal and your friend or loved one pulled out their laptop to surf the Web or c  heck their e-mail? Well, that's the same thing you're doing when you play on your iPhone or BlackBerry instead of paying attention to others. Unless you are a surgeon that is waiting to dash off to do a heart transplant as soon as the helicopter arrives, leave your phone in the car. If the dinner or lunch conversation is truly important to you, then leave your cell phone put away. What is more important, some trivial update that you can catch up on later, or the person that is sitting across the table from you?If you must bring your phone along, please at least turn off the ringer. Cell phones ring or vibrate loudly at inappropriate times far too often. Whether it's out of laziness or the stress of disconnection, many people refuse to simply turn off their phone. If you want to show people how important they are to you try something radical. Pull out your phone. Turn it off in front of them and place it somewhere away from the table and look them in the face communicating that they have your focus for the time being. This is powerful kindness. In fact, you should consider doing it with people you don’t know. We talk a great deal about being kind to people in the service industry, but let me let you in on a little secret. You can undo every gesture of kindness you might have invested over time by one simple act—talking on you phone in the middle of being waited on at your table or a counter. Think I am wrong? Go without a cell phone for a day and just frequent any place where customer service is going on. Watch the facial expression of cashiers and clerks when they are “put on hold” by cell phone users. At best, you're making others wait, and, at worst, you're saying, "You're not important to me, servant." First off, no matter how interesting you may think you are, no one wants to hear your conversation in the first place, so forcing everyone near the counter to listen in on your self-important gab is annoying. Take it outside, or take the call later—let the person behind you go next if you choose to take the call. You know how we talk about paying for the person’s bill behind you? How effective do you think this will be if you have made them wait longer because cell phone call? It is even worse if you are a loud talker—guess what, chances are if your read Serve Magazine, you are what other people would describe as a loud talker. By the way, lighten up on showing off all those applications. Most of us have seen the commercials. If we want a phone that can wax the floor and make us ice cream, we will buy one. While we are on that topic, snapping constant pictures with your new smart phone is very annoying—especially when people are just trying to enjoy a conversation at lunch with you. This is especially true if you are snapping photos trying to catch folks in awkward pose or in a strange context.  If you go into a movie theater, leave your smart phone in the car. While I might be curious about some trivial question that arises, I can go check IMDB.com when I get home—I don’t need you to keep looking stuff up and handing me your smart phone to show me the cool thing you just learned about the actress playing the hero’s sister. The purpose of every movie is to help the viewer to escape—to become a part of the movie. People that are willing to spend the dough on a going to see a first-run film at a cinema rather than wait for it to come out on DVD are doing it for the special effect that can only be achieved in a dark theater hall. That's what makes movies great. The moment a viewer is disturbed, however, they are pulled out of that wonderful experience. Your crucial text, email, or surfing session ruined everyone’s night vision for at least five minutes and they probably missed something the director thought was important enough to put in the film. Unfortunately for movie viewers, smart phones have incredibly large screens equipped with ambient light sensors which boost brightness in the dark. When you popped your phone on for an instant, it was like shining a floodlight in the eyes of everyone beside and behind you. Even if you do buy everyone free popcorn and soda in the theater, they will remember you as the dunderhead with a nightlight, so you should probably not waste your breath telling them how much God loves them.
 Ken Glassmeyer is the Editor of Serve! Magazine. He has been doing SE outreach in the midwest for over twenty years. He currently leads a "not-so-small" group bible study in his community. Ken is the author of a number of PDF guides available at Kindness Resources including the latest: "Tactical Kindness" You can contact Kindness Resources for more information on having him come to your church to coach, speak or consult. | |
|
Return to Top | Table of Contents | Back Issues
Stay Equipped to Serve
Copyright © 2010 Serve! with Steve Sjogren.
All rights reserved.